Mirmir: My First Little Officemate

I used to work in a multinational company when I was in my mid-20s. At age 25, I gave birth to Mirmir. I hired a nanny to take care of him because I only had two months to spend for my maternity leave. Since most of my time is spent at work, and I had to waste over three hours of my time each day for travel and heavy traffic, I have not afforded to provide him ample attention during his tender age.

Realization struck me that I had to leave my work in Makati City when one night that I was trying to put my son to sleep, he pushed me away and said, “I don’t want you, I want my yaya!” I called his nanny right away and watched her lull my baby. On the side, hand on my chest, I gaze upon them helplessly while feeling my bleeding heart.

After my five fulfilling years in that private company, I took my early retirement there to find a new job in my home city. I landed working at the local government as a writer. The pay was not as good as the one I left at the financial institution I was from, but the thrill and excitement that the job had lavished me were worth the sacrifice. More than that, I also had the time to balance my career with my family life since the proximity of my house to my workplace was whole lot nearer.

The “balance” part was not entirely smooth sailing because our domestic issues were quite toxic almost all the time, and the “creative” aspect of my work required long hours of diligent attention. The good thing was, even if the household would have concerns such as resigning nannies or helpers, ex-hubby’s qualms about my frequent overtime at work, and other family emergencies, I could bring my child at work anytime and my boss and co-workers then did not mind.

Mirmir just turned three years old and he could barely talk when I started working at the city hall. My officemates witnessed him grow from being a playful toddler to a smart little kid. Just like his dad, Mirmir also has a way with people. He’s not shy and he’s comfortable speaking with adults. 

I guess soon, my daughter Hami is also bound to become my next little officemate.

The pictures below show what my "junior boss" does in our office. 

I can leave him at the office while I do fieldwork. He’d take some selfies if he’s bored.

While I’m not on my station, he’d pretend he’s a writer too just like his mommy.

The not-so-fun part is that he’s always complaining that he’s hungry. His strong appetite is a challenge in my budget but nevertheless, I always give in so that while he’s busy munching I could do my job.

He’s part of our team building and photo shoots.

Sometimes he’s also the subject for our communication materials.

His network of friends extends to the kids of my officemates too.

He gets to join employee-friends' outings and he earns experience out of these

Stay put Boss Mirmir.  You’ll be proud of your mommy. (And thank you city hall for understanding the ordeals of a single mom like me.)

Scrapbooking Photobooth Mementos

A couple of months ago, or it could be some years ago, I thought of collating all my photo booth souvenirs from the various parties I attended. After having stocked all the photos in one of my bags, I finally had the time to create a scrapbook for my treasured mementos last holy week vacation.
 

If you’re going to create one for yourself, I suggest that you buy a small clear book at the National Bookstore so that the look of your output will be photo album-like and neat.

The materials I used are the basic art stuff you’ll need when creating a project for a grade-schooler – scissors, art papers, glue or double-sided tape, and stickers.

Upon posting on Instagram and syncing on Facebook the photo of my latest hobby, my artsy mother-friends "liked" my post right away. I bet they’re longing to do the same but they just haven’t had the time to do scrapbooking due to mommy and wifey duties that need to be prioritized.

Indeed, time is gold. And me-time is priceless! 

‘The Value of Women’ According to Bb. Bigatin 2016 Title Holder

Valenzuela City folks love beauty pageants. Perhaps this could be attributed to the rural-like practices of people who live in District 1, who are still very much engaged into Catholic’s ostentatious traditions such as the flores de mayo, fiestas, sagala, sayawan sa calle, and the likes.

In flores de mayo and sagala events, pretty young girls with their handsome escorts are paraded on the streets at night. They are accompanied by their supportive relatives and friends who are proud of their beautiful and voluptuous physical appearance. Over time, the people’s fascination to flores de mayo and sagala gave way to the birth of community beauty pageants, now being joined by young ladies and gents, who perhaps once dreamt of claiming a spot in the limelight business.

Amidst the city being plagued by community runway shows and pageants that further reinforce the notion of commercial beauty – the perception that only those who are skinny or only those with nice make up and poise are pretty – the local government of Valenzuela came up with a beauty pageant intended for plus-size women, the “Binibining Bigatin 2016.”

See related post here: http://missvalenzuela.blogspot.com/2016/03/talent-night-memories.html

This was the first time that horizontally-gifted women ruled the local social media site of Valenzuela. Netizens were supportive of the endeavour which they find both hilarious and meaningful.

The Bb. Bigatin winners were:

Bb. Bigatin 2016 Title Holder:       Miss Joan Calip (Brgy. Maysan)

First Runner-up:             Miss Rea Donna Regondola (WIN Youth Club Pinalagad Chapter)

Second Runner-up:         Miss Leni Gene Dichoso (Brgy. Rincon)

Third Runner-up:             Miss Rodalyn del Rosario (Brgy. Coloong)

Fourth Runner-up:          Miss Rona Tayao (Brgy. Gen. T. de Leon)

During the coronation night, one could read from Miss Calip’s facial expression that she was not expecting to bag the grand title at all. But because of her response during the Q & A portion, she won the nod of approval of the scrutinizing judges.

The question to her in our local vernacular was, “If not beauty and body, what is it in women that men should look for?” She immediately answered, “Value.” She further explained, “Men should find the value of women. They are the lights of the home, the caretakers of the family. Our society will not be essentially complete without the women.”

Bb. Bigatin 2016 Miss Joan Calip & Miss Valenzuela

I couldn’t agree more. While a lot of men would be chasing ladies who seem to be more eye-catchy, they also seem to forget that beauty is only skin-deep and that it also fades as time goes by. Women, who are mothers, have proven their capability to shower love around by simply taking care and protecting their families.

Her message should echo not only to men but to other women also, who are being unhappy in their domestic circumstances. Ladies, know your worth. When you know how to value yourself, you can’t be easily shaken.

March is My Month because I'm a Woman

Today I just want to thank the Lord for giving me strength to accomplish all the tasks laid upon my shoulders. I have actually planned not to report to work today. My tired brain has been complaining since last week. But since my body clock didn’t allow me to sleep longer than what I have imagined I should savour this morning (or perhaps this is the effect of my stressful week), I decided to work anyhow to make myself productive. I played with my make-up to conceal the zombie in me who is already on the verge of tearing my doll-like face to manifest itself. Haha!

Lord, I can’t thank you enough for making my son excel in school despite my lack of presence in his schooling.

Dear son, congratulations for being part of your class’ top ten students.

I also want to thank the Lord for letting me accomplish the Bb. Bigatin beauty pageant with flying colors. I was able to rub elbows with actor Aaron Villena, and I was also able to see my grade school classmate, Jayson Diwa, who is now an excellent song writer and performer.

with ABS CBN actor "Aaron"

with Jayson D

Thank you for the trust being given to me by Maám Dorothy, one of our esteemed department heads at the City Hall. She made me come up on stage twice to be recognized by the crowd as somebody “important” as if I belong in the ranks of the PLV university president and our city councilors.

Best in Summer Wear

Bb. Bigatin 2016

Bb. Bigatin 2016

Title Holder

with my colleagues

Of course I am also a proud teacher of BSA 2-2. They have been there for me since the pre-pageant of Bb. Bigatin up until last night. The all-girl groups performed captivating dance numbers which reinforced the notion of equality, denoting that dance floors are not gendered spaces for males alone but also for females.

BSA 2-2

Talent Night Memories

The women’s month organizers came to me last month to seek for my assistance so that I could also contribute some inputs to make their events a little bit better. I have been tapped to document their cooking showdown, magna carta for women symposium, and my favourite of all – the beauty pageant for plus size women dubbed as the “Binibining Bigatin 2016” (Miss Heavyweight 2016).

The Candidates, The Judges, & The Organizers

I opted to call the pre-pageant as the Talent Night because that’s what comprises the entirety of the activity. On March 16, the lovely lady-candidates showcased their oozing guts during the talent portion, which was held at the second floor hallway of SM Hypermarket – Valenzuela.

On the program I drafted, the department head of the organizers was supposed to deliver the welcome remarks. Unfortunately, the esteemed officer was unable to attend due to some other pressing concerns. So as a band aid solution, yours truly was compelled to do the opening remarks. It was an exhilarating experience because it’s my first time to deliver a short inspirational speech in front of the public. Good thing making an impromptu speech is my league since I was a speech major and I’m a college instructor.

I started off my speech by discussing the women’s month celebration. I briefly underrated the commercialized notion of beauty which promotes the idea that “beautiful” women should be skinny and sexy. Having gone through episodes of being fat, of course I can relate with how our candidates feel whenever judgmental people give their insulting, mindless, and unsolicited remarks. So I ended my spiel by saying in Tagalog that real beauty is not measured by the size of the body, but rather, overall personality and set of good values.

I enjoyed the part when the candidates introduced themselves with funny pick up lines. One mentioned that it’s better to love a fat woman because you’ll have a girlfriend, a pillow and a bed, all in one! Haha! That was spoken with matching sexy gestures. Hilarious. I nearly decided to make her the Miss Talent because her inhibition-free presentation was a little vulgar sexy dance which wowed the crowd. Something in my mind told me that no matter how entertaining her dance number was, it might still upset some moralists so I opted to mark her down and choose somebody else with real skills. The one who did bar tending exhibition won the Miss Talent award.

By the way, I’m not the sole judge; I’m just one of the three.

Judges: I, Mr. OLFU & Miss GTDL

                Another highlight of the pre-pageant was the participation of my Philippine Literature students who did filler-intermission numbers throughout the Talent Night to ensure minimized dead air. The move was like hitting two birds in one stone. One, the students gained fun experience and exposure. Two, the organizers saved money because despite the fact that my students are not professional performers, they were still able to perform well. It’s a win-win scenario.

Shifting Social Life

When I became a first time mom at age 25, I thought that I’m gonna have to say good bye to my social life forever. My focus shifted from “it’s all about me” to “it’s all about my family.” I was unmindful letting several company team buildings slip away then because I was always rushing to go back home after work. I lay low on chasing my dreams because of my rigid concept of “family first.”

Ocean Park (pre-Mirmir period)

Ocean Park (post-Mirmir period)

Gradually, my notion of social life shifted from “spending time with friends” to “exploring the world around with my son.” Instead of bars and beers, I preferred kiddie tours and play dates.

Cultural Tour 1 : National Museum

Cultural Tour 2 : Children's Musem in Pasay City

Cultural Tour 3 : Valenzuela City Museum

Cultural Tour 4 : Museo ni Jose Rizal in Calamba, Laguna

Cultural Tour 5: Intramuros

After eight years of being a wife, my relationship with my children’s dad went astray. For quite some time, I went back to clubbing and beer sprees. I was like a caged bird that was finally set free. I missed my freedom so much!

“Single and ready to mingle” – although this completely describes my awesome life at this point, too much bonding with close friends is just not 100% me. So I decided to change again my notion of an ideal social life - it's a happy time with people who matter. And God is great because He’s lavishing me also with so much opportunity to shine brighter and touch young lives deeper. 

with my students
(PLV)

with my officemates
(Sugar Cravings, Town Center)

with my family
(Hundred Islands)

‘Religious’ Government Offices

A couple of months ago, I went to Pag-Ibig Fund in Caloocan City branch to pay my dues. I noticed an altar in one of its offices at the second floor. The scenario is a strong imagery of a dominant religion’s inevitable influence in the government in terms of space.

An Altar at Pag-ibig (HDMF) Caloocan City Branch

Apart from being proud of one’s religion or projecting an image of religiosity, could this also be an intentional ploy for image management to subtly tell its members that our government is doing its job well because we respect God hence we have integrity? I opt not to be pessimistic because so far, compared with other government agencies that I have dealt with, I could really say that Pag-Ibig is quite organized and well-run.

In Valenzuela City, it is also a unique culture of its local government employees to display their faith. On Mondays, during flag raising ceremonies, bible verses are read and reflected on by certain Christian pastors. On Fridays, almost always without skip, Friday masses are held in different venues – AVR, amphitheatre, lobby, tax payer’s lounge, etc. I also learned that there are certain offices at the Geronimo Angeles Building (the Finance Building) that briefly pause their operation every afternoon for the three o’clock habit. While the radio is turned on and the loud prayer flutters on the airwaves, the employees stop whatever it is that they’re doing, for them to feel the presence of the Lord in their work space. If you’re a taxpayer who’d get to chance upon this scene, you’d probably quiver inside.

The 3 O'clock Prayer
Source: Pinterest

In our country, we often hear the notion of “Separation of Church and State.” Some say this should be reinforced, whatever this implies. The concept is profound and may be debatable. From a sheer observer’s perspective, most especially in small-scale practices, I see no harm in diligently exercising your faith. If your religion can guide you and remind you each day to behave accordingly and be upright in all government transactions, not only will you become a model employee of the institution you’re in, you’ll also become an effective handmaid of the Lord. It’s a win-win, whichever angle you look at.

A Family Tree is Money Tree

One unforgettable lesson I learned from the Gift of God Catholic Community is the notion that, whenever we need help, God is always sending us the aid that we need. A lot of times, we just need to use our “coconut shell” to figure out how to get through an uncomfortable situation.

At this point, my heaviest problem is on my mishandled finances. My loans cost more than what I am earning that’s why I have to keep several jobs.  Because of my situation, I have rubbed elbows with the loan sharks at work. During emergencies, every time I need money, I run to them to pawn my payroll ATM card so that I could have immediate cash. Although this is hassle-free, still, the interest can kill me big time if I continue this practice.

Good thing, I’ve been reading articles about managing finances and I read somewhere that if you want to save money from interests, you can borrow money from your relatives.

Here in the Philippines, the culture of close family ties resides. This culture helped me tremendously because through the help of my supportive relatives, little by little, I’m getting back on track. I was also able to buy three computer sets for my small printing shop through financial aids at “pay-when-able” basis.

I have proven to myself once more that in challenging situations, God will surely send help no matter how impossible the conditions may seem. We just need to open our eyes wider so that we could find God’s grace around. If at certain point we cannot comprehend the Lord’s message, all we need to do is to just continue to pray. For God will lead the way.

On this blog, I just want to say thank you to all my relatives and friends who continue to give me support. Indeed, there is sunshine after the storm. Thanks guys for sticking around.

Life Is A Press Release

I heard my wise friend once say, “Writing is therapeutic.” Maybe this is the reason why a lot of people, including me, post dramatic status on Facebook which sooner or later we also regret. Time and experience have taught me that while we may feel “free” every time we write; we should also be responsible netizens to avoid hurting others’ feelings. Once you use the social media platform to attack other people, it is already an indication that you’re a disturbed person on your way to self-destruction.

Lately, I have been reiterating that life is all about press release and image management. I often use our unsung heroes as examples of people whose names were never published in history books because they were ordinary folks who did not have access to the print media. There could have been braver and nobler Filipinos than Rizal and Bonifacio whose contributions remained unknown, simply because their contributions were never documented. Therefore, you have to document your significance while you can because you can’t expect others to do it for you.

While some people with seemingly ill reputation would say, “I do not have to explain myself to other people,” we also have to realize that we live in a judgmental world. Whatever you do, whether good or bad, you will be prejudged anyway. So you have to use your tools wisely to portray to the world the kind of image you want others to see in you. Conceal the bad and broadcast what’s good. Hopefully, you’d get to share more positive vibes. And of course, your real friends will be happy to also see you enjoying your life. Dwell not in self-pity, but rather, realize all the gifts around you from the Lord. 

"Not Your Usual Self"
This is my team's Halloween peg for our photoshoot.
Wear the mask of your choice so you could feel good about yourself.